Gentle Folk of Charity,
It is with profound sadness and reticence that I regret to inform you of the sudden and premature death of Magnum Gagnon. He was a generous mustache and will be missed by millions of his fans. He was taken from us in the early hours of December 1st due to a freak manscaping accident... we are all quite devastated. I hope you will all take this opportunity to give a moment of silence for this brilliant mustache that shined so brightly for a very short period of time.
In Mourning,
Peter Gagnon
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